Hello everyone and welcome to today's episode, no. 66, where as always I’m here to help us consider ways we can find more joy in our relationships. Because after all, we were made for this.

In the past few episodes (episode 65   episode 64   episode 63  episode 62 )we’ve been considering the only two questions you need to remember in getting to know someone better. Just two questions to ask that will lead to a meaningful conversation with most anyone.

Namely, first of all asking myself  “From what I know about this person, what might it be like to be them?” And secondly, asking the other person a follow-up question.

I don’t know about you, but I often learn best by seeing something demonstrated. So that’s what we’re doing in today’s program. I’m going to let you listen in on a recent conversation I had with someone to show what it’s like to stretch our curiosity muscles by asking the two questions we’ve been talking about lately: What might it be like to be them, and follow-up questions.

Now even if this topic doesn’t really interest you, I’m pretty sure you’ll at least be interested in the story our guest has to share.

I’ve wanted to talk with Maureen Kasdorf for 8 months or so because of a post she put on Facebook about the time she felt so depressed she considered ending her life because the emotional pain she was experiencing at the time was so unbearable.

Maureen and I go to the same church, but I didn’t know her all that well until we started working together on the search team looking for a new pastor for our congregation several years ago. She put in a lot of work for our team, and was always enthusiastic and fun to be around.

So when I saw her Facebook post it stunned me that there was this dark chapter in her life I never would guessed was part of her story.

Well, let’s get to the phone call I had arranged with Maureen. She settled in her 3 young children so we could talk, and their patience with their mom on the phone isn’t going to last forever. So let’s get to it.

[Interview starts with phone ringing. Sorry, there's no transcript available]

If you forget everything else, here’s the one thing I hope you remember from today’s episode.

God often uses the most broken among us to care for us when WE are broken. Look for the broken people to help. They get you.


Well what can we do in response to today’s show?

This episode is first airing in May of 2020. Every year, since 1949, May has been designated as National Mental Health Month. One way we can respond to today’s program is to ask, what can I do to nurture my own mental health, as well as the mental health of others?

As an example, we can follow Maureen’s suggestion near the end of our conversation. She said recognize when things are not right, name it if you can, and ask for help. Maureen said it’s okay to ask for help, so don’t let your pride get in the way. If you don’t have anyone in your life you feel you can ask, call the suicide hotline number any time, day or night.

That number is 800. 273. 8255.

As for nurturing the mental health of others, I suggest let’s reflect the character of Jesus in our relationships. Be the kind of person people are drawn to because of our kindness, our wisdom, our compassion. God uses these kinds of people to help others, too. Just like the broken among us. Often they are one and the same.

As always, another thing you could do is let me and your fellow listeners know what resonated with you about today’s episode. You can share your thoughts in the “Leave a Reply” box at the bottom of the show notes. Or you can send them to me in an email to john@caringforothers.org.


I have more to say about today’s episode, but I don’t want to take anything away from Maureen’s story right now. So we’ll save that for next week when I come back and talk about the listening component to today’s show. We’ll examine more closely how well I did in using the two questions we’ve been talking about the past few episodes, What might it be like to be her?, and follow-up questions.

I can tell you now, if I were to give myself a grade for how well I listened today, my first thought would be a B-. So please come back next week, to catch episode 67. I’ll explain my self-evaluation, why I don’t deserve an “A,” and what we can all learn from my mistakes, as well as what went right.

Next week, by the way is the last episode for Season Three. I’ll explain what will be happening this summer before Season Four starts up again, right after Labor Day in September.

I hope your thinking was stimulated by today’s show, to both reflect and to act. So that you will find the joy God intends for you through your relationships. Because after all, You Were Made for This.

Now for Our Relationship Quote of the Week
I’m going to go with the pivotal moment in Maureen’s story when she’s lying on her bathroom floor, sobbing, thinking “how am I going to get out of this life?” Yet God gave her the presence of mind to text a girlfriend who lived 17 seconds down the block these words:

“Help me!”

Help me. That’s our quote of the week We all need more help than we realize. Hmm.

Well that’s all for today. See you next week. Goodbye for now.