Hello everyone! I’m so glad you’ve joined us today for episode 124, “Resting In Our Identity Frees Us to Love Well”

Background to today’s program

Last week’s episode, no. 123, was all about asking two questions to deepen our relationships, namely, what are you looking forward to? and what are you dreading, or not looking forward to? Someone had recently asked me these two questions and I wanted to try asking them myself to see where they could lead.

To test this out I called four previous guests I had interviewed on our podcast – totally out of the blue. One of them was Gail Rohde from episodes 29 and 30. I’ll have links to these at the bottom of the show notes.

In those episodes, Gail shared how she was told at a young age she was adopted, and how she had no desire to look for her birth parents until she started having children of her own. This was her identity. She talks about the search for her birth parents and how it affected her to locate her birth mother and actually speak to her and make plans to meet in person. They are favorite episodes of mine.

92 episodes later

Fast forward 92 programs later to when I called Gail last week to ask her those two questions I mentioned earlier. And to find, much to my surprise, that Gail, who I remember having given up hope of ever finding her birth father, actually found him! She said meeting him was the thing she was most looking forward to, and at the same time also something she was dreading.

I was so happy for her when she told me this, at the same time feeling for her angst in what this will mean for her relationship with her birth mother. Gail readily agreed to a follow-up interview.

So listen in now, where at this point in our telephone conversation Gail shares how she located her birth father…

[I’m sorry, but there is no transcript of our phone call]

Takeaways from today’s interview with Gail Rohde

I am struck by how loving Gail is being with her birth mother through the process of searching for her birth father to discover more of her identity. How sensitive she is to her mother’s anxieties and fears of abandonment. The sacrifice Gail is making with not being able to share the joy with her mom, or on social media where her mother might see it.

Secondly, I’m captivated by Gail’s father who raised her, and how he wanted to help her find her birth parents. Gail talks more about him in episode 29. His loving character certainly rubbed off on Gail. What a great guy.

So what does all this mean for YOU?

Most of us are not adopted by earthly parents, but we do have the choice of becoming adopted children of God. God certainly wants to be our heavenly father, but only if we choose him. He never forces himself on anyone. In the Gospel of John, chapter 1 verse 12 we read,

But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God.

When we make this choice it changes our identity. It makes us a new person, and it enables us to love others well, as it does with Gail in loving her mother. And like it did with Gail’s father who raised her.

The choice is yours.

Here’s the main point I hope you remember from today’s episode

Knowing where we have come from helps us to rest in our identity. It frees us to be the person God made us to be, so we can love others well.

I’d love to hear any thoughts you have about today’s episode. Just send them to me in an email to john [at] caringforothers [dot] org. Or you can share your thoughts in the “Leave a Reply” box at the bottom of the show notes.


In closing, if you found this podcast helpful, please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts if you haven’t already done so.

I hope your thinking was stimulated by today’s show, to reflect on where you have come from and your identity. For in doing so, it will help you find the joy God intends for you through your relationships. Because after all, You Were Made for This.

Well, that’s all for today. I look forward to connecting with you again next week. Goodbye for now.

Related episodes you may want to listen to

029: An Adoption Relationship Story-Part 1

030: An Adoption Relationship Story-Part 2

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